I have always been a people pleaser. Usually a little too much so. I used to be really easy going about it - I never expected anything in return, not even any recognition. I just kind of did it. But lately my patience in that area has been running out. I suppose that it 's because I'm older now and I've developed a better concept of respect and have learned to stand up for myself. Maybe it's also because I've just worn myself out giving too much. Or maybe over the years the number of people who take it for granted has built up to the point where I can't overlook it anymore.

What hurts me the most is that some of the people closest to me are guilty of it. I feel as though they almost expect that I will just do whatever they need for them and I don't even get a simple "thank-you" from them. It's aggravating and it also makes me question our relationships. Are they using me? Do they really see nothing wrong with their behavior? Do they really have as little respect for me as they display?

I suppose in that situation most people would just stop doing things for others but I must be a glutton for punishment because I can't seem to stop myself. That sounded really arrogant. How do I rephrase that? I really just don't know how to say no, particularly when it comes to those closest to me. I enjoy taking care of people and I really do like to please people. What I really need is to learn how to stand up for myself even more so and to set solid limits to allowing people to more or less use me. Don't get me wrong - I realize that a lot of people don't mean to act like that and don't realize what they're doing - but I do need to find an effective and polite way to point that out - for my sake and for the sake of my friendships.